Wednesday, 16 September 2009

September thoughts....... I use the term 'thoughts' loosely! :o)


It’s brightened up this afternoon………. sunny, blue skies and white clouds, mixed as a fifty-fifty spread. Lovely day, and here I am writing away again. I’m kinda doing a trial run for the November nanowrimo by writing everything in Word, and then cutting/pasting into wherever they need to be, usually emails. That way I have everything in one document to keep a word-count. Last month’s, running from the 22 to the 22, was 27,000 words, this month’s count from 22 August is 39,550 (right there, at that moment). I’m going to break through 40,000 today if I can, which will mean a daily diet of 1,666 words at least, to make the 50,000 word minimum limit by the 22 September. Even if I don’t do it, it makes 50,000 in Nvember an easyish goal………. All I’ve got to do is write every single day. Skip one or two, and each days ration needs to increase; skip too many, and it will be a struggle. I’m going to reach for 100,000, and go for the impossible. As is in my nature……….. all or nothing.

Anyway, that’s getting way from this lovely day here. I guess I should take the bike, maybe Hoover for a change, even if she is still running like a sick dog. I took her out for a short wakeup spin the other day, and she seemed to be running a bit better. I’ve gotta have another look at the carbs, and I suspect it’s the emulsion jets worn oval. That’s going to be over £80 for four tiny little brass tubes.

Back to today though. A September day, and a typically lovely one too.

Both the happiest and the worst times have happened to me in September. I love the damp chill of it, the sniff of winter to come, but still warmed by blue-skied sunny days. There was a time when sometimes I loved it, and sometimes I hated it, and sometimes just bounced around between the two emotions. Most times I love it these days. It’s a peaceful month.

No other month feels like this one does……….. not even December, with all of Christmas consuming it like a blanket of snow. No, it sure is a strange month, and today feel kinda good, even though yesterday didn’t, especially with all its bad news. It seems it’s rarely a bad month for weather these days…….. our summers seem to have been replaced by sunny springs and Autumns,…… well, Septembers anyway. I checked up on which months are in which season, and, as I suspected, September is actually still summer, and autumn starts in October. Just shows how off course I’ve always been with that then, in considering September to be the start of autumn.

Yup, September is a funny month for me.

I was married in September, and she left me in September too. Just before the tenth anniversary…… ten days before I think……….. I guess facing yet another anniversary when all you wanna do is walk out of the door is a real hard thing to face. It would make you gather your nerve and make that move wouldn’t it?

I had both bad mo’sickle accidents too in September….. different years of course, when I was sixteen and again at eighteen.…….. fractured something like 23 bones, give or take a few ribs, on a life support system both times, an emergency tracheotomy carried out in the ambulance after the second accident, and bed ridded for six months recovering from the first and not fully fit for a year. Started and finished most jobs in and shortly after September too. There seems to be a whole lot around September for me.

Writing that makes me realise that most things were not that good………. getting married the only good one really, so why do I ever think well of this month? Somehow I suspect it was the magnitude of getting married to the young woman I loved so much. That event somehow carries enough weight of importance in my mind to easily balance the ending of that great relationship, and more than balances the other shit that happened in the Septembers before it and after as well.

The mind sure is a funny thing, the way it reckons all the totality of experiences into an overall ‘impression’ that we all carry of most things. When you look at those inner visions, and measure the facts of the parts that form them; the percentages, and importance, they so often just don’t weigh up to what we tend to think, or feel, about something. It goes some way to showing why we can get so many things wrong in our assessments of life, and think of experiences and chunk of life as something so very different from the reality of them. How off key we may be in basing future decisions on those impressions we have.

Come to think of it…………. I used to dread Septembers for a long time after Sue (Ex-Wife) left………. I had it in mind that it was an hugely unlucky month for me, and for an equally longish time, I now feel ok about it. If I was pushed, I’d say it’s no longer a month I don’t like. Sometimes a echo of past dread hovers around, but mostly I appreciate it as a lovely month.

Mellowing with age, I guess, and being so far from the bad times I had when I was younger too. I realise as well, that no month, or any other time frame, is necessarily responsible for any of life’s experiences, good, bad or indifferent. It’s just the way it is, and some things are bound to group up in a time frame from random, or from practical reasons linked to a certain time. After all, you’re very likely only ever going to choke on a sixpence from a Christmas pud at Christmas. :o)

Wadya think? :o)

Woo Hoo.... 40,465 words now! :o)

K.x :o)

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